This week's Newsweek had a brief article on Wikipedia. Wikipedia first came to my attention when my portal for all things word-related, One Look started using it for encyclopedic references. What's great about Wikipedia? TMN links to one today: the heavy metal umlaut entry.

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Every night, at the end of Nightline, Ted Koppel mentions how many U.S. soldiers died during the day and then the total number of U.S. deaths. Even though I heard those numbers every day, they didn't mean anything to me. I'm ashamed to admit it, but part of my response to the rising death tolls was happiness: every death served to expose the foundation of lies that the U.S. invasion of Iraq was built on.

That changed, though, with the release of the coffin photographs. I don't know how I envisioned the bodies would be returned to the U.S., maybe, you know, just stowed away with other stuff coming back. The photos of cargo planes full of coffins, and partly my weakness for minimalist art, really started to help me appreciate the human cost of the war. That's why I agree so strongly with this letter from John McCain..

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Not only has Condoleeza Rice referred to the President as her husband, the President has referred to Rice and himself as a couple:

'The President said: "I slipped on a baseball cap, pulled 'er down - as did Condi. We looked like a normal couple."'

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Most New Yorkers don't use cars to get around town. The parking of police officers' personal vehicles around police stations is a perennial problem, though, especially now around Ground Zero in Chinatown. Would a requirement that New York police officers live within the city result in fewer police officers commuting by automobile?

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SEATTLE, April 28 -- The Bush administration has decided to count Hooters waitresses when it decides whether spotted owls are entitled to protection under the Endangered Species Act. While environmentalist groups have expressed a great deal of concern about this change, federal officials stressed that this proposal is consistent with the Bush administration's other evironmental policies.

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--if you're out there, and you're keyed into a). MSTP programs and/or b). the world of potential NIH K08 grantees, can I pick your brain for a minute?

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When I read about how John Kerry gave his aide his old 1984 Dodge 600ES a couple of months ago, I started thinking about this totally tricked out late-70s Ford Fairmont that's in my neighborhood.

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The Nawawi Foundation has published an interesting paper on the many names of god. The paper argues that the English word "God" is the equivalent of "Allah" and that English speaking Muslims should not hesitate to use "God" when speaking about their religion. While the second half of the article presents a universalist argument, and I personally don't buy the argument that every religion worships a single universal creator, the discussion of the linguistic roots of the various words for god is compelling.

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An LA Times article by P.J. Huffstutter.

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Loggerhead Shrikes are also known as butcher birds because of the males' habit of impaling their prey on thorns and barbed wire fences to signal to females that they are good providers.

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The NYT is reporting that Christian churches and ministers are worried that The Da Vinci Code is sowing doubts among Americans about basic Christian beliefs. The current controversy revolves around the fact that The Da Vinci Code portrays Jesus not as a divine figure, but as a man. Some Christian leaders are worried that as a result of The Da Vinci Code, "[p]eople are buying into the notion that Jesus is not divine, he is not the son of God."

Personally, if I were them, I wouldn't worry about The Da Vinci Code popularizing the idea that Jesus is a divinely inspired human being, I'd worry about the Gospels of Mark, Matthew, and Luke. As Elaine Pagels mentions in her book Beyond Belief, the Gospel of John is the only gospel that refers to Jesus as the divine son of god. It took more than two hundred years after the writing of John's gospel for Christian bishops to adopt the idea that Jesus was divine at the contentious Council of Nicea in 325 A.D. One could argue that for about 15% of Christianity's history, from Jesus' death to the Nicene Council, the idea that Jesus was the divine son of God was not a Christian doctrine.

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After it found its way back to me this morning, I discovered that I had recently written the following note:

Hi ____,

Can you start a 374A for this TO to City of ______ MSA, review and pass to PDL?

Thanks,

Mark
x4700

And it was on a sticky-note.

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Forty-nine years old, Stein is a husband, a father, a landscaper and a Republican. He lives in a house that has six guns in the closets and 21 crosses in the main hallway. His wife cuts his hair with electric clippers. His three daughters aren't embarrassed when he kisses them on their cheeks. He loves his family, hamburgers and his dog. He believes in God, prays daily and goes to church weekly. He has a jumbo smoker in his back yard and a 40-foot tree he has climbed to hang Christmas lights. He has a pickup truck that he has filled with water for the Fourth of July parade, driving splashing kids around a community where Boy Scouts plant American flags in the yards. His truck is a Chevy. His beer is Bud Light. His savior is Jesus Christ.

His article goes on for five pages. This is such a piece of crap that I'm surprised that I made it to page two of the article. When I read stories like this, am I supposed to be upset that there are communities that are almost totally Republican? Should I be scared?

For every example that the author raises to illustrate the conservative nature of Sugarland, the same example could be used to shown to illustrate how liberal Madison is:

...the universe of Stein [hellx] is the one in which the president is Republican [illegitimate], the U.S. senators are Republicans [Democrats], the congressman is Republican [Democrat and a lesbian], the county commissioner is Republican [Progressive Dane, a liberal alternative to the Democratic Party], the Inspector of Hides and Animals is Republican [OK, I don't know if we have one of these, but my state representative is a gay Democrat], the neighbors are Republicans [Democrats, except for the ones who are Greens and progressives], the friends are Republicans [Democrats, except for the ones who are Greens and progressives], and the mayor is a Republican [Democrat, so people have concerns about city government becoming too conservative] named David [Dave] Wallace [Cieslewicz].

Why is the Republican enclave newsworthy to the Washington Post, but not the liberal version?

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The March for Women's Lives was not just about abortion, as the NYT would have you believe, but it represented the work of a "a coalition of groups that want to improve women's access to reproductive education health care worldwide."

It's just too bad that I couldn't make it to the march. I would have gotten so lucky with this line:

"Hey baby, want to exercise your reproductive rights?"

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There are a couple of interesting articles in the Lawrence Journal World today. One is about Bill James, a nationally famous baseball writer who's lived in Lawrence most of his life. You should definitely read this one, and pay attention to the parts about his college years.

Also, there's a sort of meta-article in the paper. Apparently there's a piece in Harper's April issue about current partisan politics in Kansas, and the LJW wrote an article about the Harper's article. Zero points for originality, there, but now I'm kinda interested to find a Harper's issue, since this particular piece doesn't seem to be readily available online.

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I made my annual shopping trip today. Even I had to acknowledge what Dr. No has been telling me for five months -- the khakis I wear to work look a bit frayed, and the lapels and collars of my shirts have more ripply white edges than some Rocky Mountain tributaries.

So the good news: All my careful eating and gym attendance has paid off in two inches less on my pants size. The bad news: It's all in the legs. How can a 31-year-old adult male shrink to a 30-inch leg from a 32-inch leg in a year?

God I love the Gap. By definition I can't buy anything there that looks out of place. America's Uniform®!

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try toothpastefordinner.com

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The Big Kerplop!, the Mad Scientists' Club novel, has been reissued.

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With spammers these days generating messages with random dictionary words in order to fool spam-detection software, the results are sometimes pretty interesting. I remember people here mentioned some fun names they'd seen on messages, but I got one today that was almost poetic:

Subject: annulus
Date: Fri, 23 Apr 2004 16:06:24 -0100

Pagan,
75%off for all New Softwares.
WindowXP,Photoshop,Window2003...etcMore

http://[url removed]

ribald,his eyes like.

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Not satisfied with the official Kerry t-shirts, a group of style-conscious liberals have formed Designs on the White House. DOTWH will host a Kerry t-shirt design contest and the winning designs will be sold through the website. Proceeds from the sales will be donated to the Kerry campaign.

I've developed a love for the ephemera of political campaigns (I believe that you all have seen my "Reagan-Bush 1980: The Time is Now" button), so I can't wait. I'm already a proud owner of John Kerry "vintage ringer" t-shirt and I wanted to get a George Bush t-shirt but they suck with the power of a thousand suns. You would not catch me dead in any of those t-shirts.

It was actually amazingly hard to find the George Bush campaign store. If you type "bush t-shirts" into Google, the campaign store doesn't show up until page six of the results. The first five pages are dedicated to the anti-Bush movement. I'm thinking about getting this t-shirt, not because I agree with the statement, but simply because it is so over the top that I can't help but giggle. I'll even it out with this t-shirt from a conservative t-shirt seller. For some reason, though, I don't think a Reagan shirt on me will cause people to think I'm a conservative. Of course, that may have something to do with the fact that I'm going to add Reagan Youth to it in magic marker.

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Former NFL player Pat Tillman was killed in Afghanistan. So I know this shouldn't affect me anymore than than any of the other hundreds of deaths in Iraq, but it does. You just hope that someone who gives up millions of dollars to enlist in the army comes out of the army alive. I had some of the same reactions when Lori Piestewa became the first female soldier killed in Iraq.

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Eye-catching New York Times item filed from Mexico:

The police in the central state of Michoacan arrested a tamale vendor after finding a mutilated body in his home. The police suspect the vendor killed a friend after a fight and may have put his flesh into a batch of tamales, a popular dish of chopped meat wrapped in a softened corn husk. Investigators were conducting tests on the tamales and on pots of boiled meat found in the vendor's home. The case was front-page news, prompting headlines like "Tamales of Death!"

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MIAMI, April 22 -- Dieting adults who love their beer, but have given it up based on the advice of "The South Beach Diet" author Dr. Arthur Agatston now have good news: His attacks on beer are based on errors, which his online nutritionists now admit.

The best-selling "South Beach Diet" book slams beer and bans drinking it, saying it is high in maltose, a form of sugar.

The trouble is, there is no maltose in beer.

Maltose, from barley malt, is found in beer only in its early brewing stages and is eliminated when yeast converts it to alcohol and carbonation. Budweiser, Bud Light, Michelob, Michelob ULTRA and all major-selling Anheuser- Busch beers contain no maltose.

"The notion that beer contains large amounts of carbohydrates is simply untrue," said Dr. Sam Klein, director of the Center for Human Nutrition at Washington University School of Medicine. "Furthermore, the carbohydrates in beer are not sugar. Basically all of the sugar is converted to alcohol during fermentation."...

"Independent testing confirms there is no maltose -- or any other sugar -- in our beers, or most other popular beers," said Douglas J. Muhleman, group vice president and chief brewmaster at Anheuser-Busch, Inc. "This is a basic fact of brewing science, and a call to any brewer would have cleared this up for Dr. Agatston."

In his book, Agatston advises dieters to "avoid white wine, spirits, or, worst of all, beer"; calls maltose in beer "even worse than table sugar"; calls maltose "the king of all sugars" that leads to a "beer belly"; and says "guzzling this beverage" encourages "storage of fat around the midsection."

"We have notified Dr. Agatston about his inaccuracies," said Francine Katz, Anheuser-Busch vice president and spokesperson. "Unfortunately, he has so far refused to remove these false statements from his books and Web site. He has taken no substantive action to make it known to the millions of people who followed his advice that the information he provided on beer is terribly flawed and misleading. They have a right to know the truth, so we are doing our best to provide it."

Anheuser-Busch has placed full-page ads in 31 national and local newspapers nationwide to advise beer drinkers of the mistakes on beer in "The South Beach Diet." The ads will run April 23.

"Adults who responsibly enjoy beer -- particularly light beer -- have no need to feel the 'carb guilt' that Dr. Agatston has wrongly attached to beer," said Katz. "We want all adult beer drinkers who might be watching their carbs to know that." ...

Despite the fact that Agatston and his online nutritionists have partially acknowledged the truth about beer carbohydrates, they have done so only to the limited audience in the diet's chat room and have not changed the information on beer in the "South Beach" books or Web site...

When questioned about low-carb beers by one chat room dieter, Agatston replied: "All of the alcoholic beverages, when consumed in moderation, appear to have favorable effects on heart disease and diabetes prevention. We feel that, as a rule, consuming alcohol with a meal is much more preferable than is consuming alcohol on an empty stomach. We also prefer the low-carb beers, such as Michelob ULTRA, to the high-carb beers."

This revised advice about beer comes after Anheuser-Busch notified Agatston about the inaccuracies in letters sent to him in February and March...

Based in St. Louis, Anheuser-Busch Cos. Inc. (NYSE: BUD) is the leading U.S. brewer and holds a 50 percent share in Grupo Modelo, Mexico's leading brewer. In a survey of 10,000 business leaders and securities analysts, Anheuser-Busch ranked first overall in quality of products and services among nearly 600 companies researched in FORTUNE magazine's 2004 "America's Most Admired Companies" listing. The company is one of the largest theme park operators in the United States, is a major manufacturer of aluminum cans and is the world's largest recycler of aluminum beverage containers. SOURCE Anheuser-Busch, Inc.

/CONTACT: Carlos Ramirez of Anheuser-Busch, Inc., +1-314-577-9629, carlos.ramirez@anheuser-busch.com /

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The Progressive Review published a funny ancedote from David Rubenstein about why George Bush left the board of the Carlyle Group.

from unfogged via brad delong via etc.

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Last night during Nightline's discussion of the Supreme Court arguments of the detainees in Guatanamo, the individual defending the Bush administration said that all U.S. combatants qualify for POW status because they are part of a regular militia and always wear uniforms. The US, however, also employs private security firms who don't wear uniforms. Are private security firms, as a result, unlawful combatants under the Bush administration's definition?

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I pretty much got cursing out of my system in fifth grade when, at any time where I was outside the earshot of an authority figure, every other word was either shit or fuck. Since I don't curse very much, I've never felt the need to use the euphemisms talked about in this LA Times story. One paragraph really caught my attention, however:

Among Mormon students at Brigham Young University campuses these days, "fetch" is one substitute for the curse word, but not as popular as "flippin', freakin' and freak," says Kay Ushijima, a BYU student preparing a senior thesis on the topic.

Like caffeine and alcohol, cursing is prohibited by the Church of Latter Day Saints and is considered a sinful action. Maybe it's just my evil post-modern mind working, but it seems to me that substituting "freaking" or whatever for "fucking" should be just as sinful as saying fucking. I would argue that the use of freaking as an interjection is predicated on the common usage of fucking as an interjection and that the explicit intent of using the word "freak" is to call the word "fuck" to mind.

It just reminds me of those kids who sign contracts that say they will remain virgins until marriage and then go out and have anal sex. This is why I have little respect for organized religion; it's all about the loopholes.

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Does anybody have an opinion on William Langewiesche?

Also, I've been working on a catchphrase that starts out, "That's crazier than _____," but I can't find a catchy comparison. Here are some of my ideas, but none of them seem quite right:

• the Christian Right
  
• Jerry Falwell
  
• the Church of Latter Day Saints
  
• Pentecostalism
  
• Ralph Nader
  
• Log Cabin Republicans
  

Any ideas, preferably ideas that would upset some group of people who think they're normal but are in fact crazy, would be welcome.

Finally, at a time when Norlos has been re-evaluating the merits of Ice Ice Baby, Blender has named it ten worst songs of all time.

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You've been wondering, "What is that Dennis Kucinich up to these days?"

Turns out, he's in Oregon! Not only that, but Oregon is part of a key strategy to snag a few delegates before the convention. And where does the K-man plan to stage his last stand? Across the street from my bus stop, of course.

Yep, the Oregon Kucinich office just opened up in the back side of a typewriter store (did you know they even still have those?), behind a hedge, next to a Jiffy Lube. If I had a digital camera I could get you all a GREAT picture...

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Recently, Slate drew my attention to a meme I wasn't aware of: faux bands, like Les Sans Coulottes. I didn't think more about it until last night when I was listening to Blackjack Radio. Some people say Art's kind of a poseur, what with his hard luck bio and all, but who am I to judge? Anyway, he was playing some Upper Crust which really does sound like old AC/DC. He played "Finished with Finishing School" and "Badminton", but my personal favorite song name is "Friend of a friend of the working man". I'm not sure whether Upper Crust are poseurs or not. But ain't nobody can tell me that Hells Belles don't kick ass.

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One of my friends in Madison likes to play game where one person names a song and the other has to sing the lyrics of "Ice Ice Baby" to that song's tune. To increase my familiarity with the lyrics, I've been listening to a lot of Vanilla Ice during my free 14-day RealRhapsody trial. I have to say that while I absolutely hated the song when it was popular, now I find it a remarkably good pop song. I actually enjoy listening to it.

As far as RealRhapsody is concerned, I'm kind of leaning towards subscribing. The sound quality is good and the major label catalog is comprehensive, so, while it may lack stuff from K or Lookout!, there's still plenty of interesting stuff there.

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Men's National Bowling Championship
Bringing the Helmer Cup back to Lawrence.

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I know this because L. Paul Bremer's mother-in-law is also the grandmother of one of my acquaintances in Madison.

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The UW-Madison has always had a reputation for not being very friendly to minority students. Every year, though, a student organization called Hip Hop Generation hosts the increasingly influential "Hip Hop as a Movement" conference.

Among the participants in this year's conference were the great Dead Prez.

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I was watching 60 Minutes last night, and saw a pretty amazing interview with Bob Woodward. I didn't think there was much this administration could still do to shock me, but this quote did:

Woodward told 60 Minutes that Saudi Prince Bandar has promised the president that Saudi Arabia will lower oil prices in the months before the election - to ensure the U.S. economy is strong on election day.

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And I know this because the decapitated cat commercial is the funniest thing I've seen in a long time.

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what happens when you enter www.clay.com?
this:

Clay helps clients take ownership of a set of words that seduce as well as differentiate. In this environment, we are not operating in a monetary economy. The currency here is attention span. And the expert storyteller dominates.

that is like me to a tea--only without the attention span.

if you look for jebus4me, you end up as some sex slave trading site. that might also be me, only without the sex.

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Years before he rose to fame as the star of a show I didn't watch, Jason Alexander sang, rocked, danced and wore a bad hairpiece while pimping processed beef.

Thanks, Fuck All Y'all.

Speaking of shows I never watched, does anybody besides me remember that George Clooney in the 1980s starred in a show also called E.R.?

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The record label Table of the Elements, owned by Madison resident Jeff Hunt, has released 9 Beet Stretch, a recording of Beethoven's Ninth Symphony digitally elongated to a length of 24 hours.

Tonight 9 Beet Stretch, or, as I call it, 9 Beet Street, makes its U.S. premier at Madison's Theo Kupfer Ironworks:

Refreshments will be provided at opening and closing receptions at 7 tonight and 8 p.m. Saturday, and audience members who plan to stay for the duration are welcome to fortify themselves with other provisions within reason, says Hunt. (No pets, please.) Less hardy souls have the option of coming and going, or stopping by for a quick taste of experimental music and industrial architecture - except between the hours of midnight and 6 a.m., when the doors will be locked.

"In the spirit of adventure, anybody that wants to come and stay 24 hours in a 39,000-square-foot iron foundry should plan accordingly," says Hunt.

I was planning to go over to the Ironworks when I got done at the door around 12:30 or 1:00 AM, but it looks like I'll have to wait until tomorrow to check it out.

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Plantnerd's been a long-time lurker and contributer, so it's time to give the Chlorophylled One her due. As of today, she's a member. Let's all give her a rousing Norlos welcome!

(Of course, this means we'll likely never hear from her again...)

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Today's Slate has an article defending the Liars' latest album They Were Wrong So We Drowned, or as I call it They Were So Wrong We Drowned. What really caught my eye, however, was a word that I had never seen before:

Whatever Liars' reputed live skills, this is not, as a Strokes album might conceivably be, an album for Friday nights in a dive bar, frugging to the jukebox and chugging Pabst Blue Ribbon.

Frugging? While I was able to come up with a definition, "to perform a type of vigorous dance," I was unable to find an origin for this definition. Another definition for frug is "fund-raising under the guise of."

Has anybody ever heard this word used colloquially?

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My gym recently started offering Yamuna Body Rolling classes. After seeing the flyers and learning that each class costs $10, I thought "Sh-yeah right, there's no way I'm going to be doing that joke." Well, every Thursday I do restorative yoga with two to three other people. Unlike your average yoga class at my gym, which is probably 75% women and generally pretty crowded, very few people go to restorative yoga and it's me and another guy who have formed the core of the class and attend every week.

Anyway, restorative yoga is a really intimate setting and the instructor also teaches Yamuna Body Rolling and like 50 other classes when she's not working in her biology lab. As a change of pace last night, we incorporated some body rolling into our restorative yoga class and I gotta say: yamuna body rolling, while faddish, is pretty fucking great. It's a combination of stretching, deep tissue massage and pilates. I'm not going to be a weekly participant in body rolling classes, but I think I'm going to do it a couple of times a month.

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The above phrase brings many dozens of visitors to the blog thanks to this post and subsequent discussion. But what they're looking for is this Urban Outfitters shirt (to the left). At first I was amused by it. But now I wonder whether it isn't a wee tad condescending. Obviously, UO wants people other than Kansans to buy them. Is it meant to be an ironic statement about mild, unthreatening Kansans? If it is, may I introduce you to the hard-rhymin' Dr. No and to Plantnerd the Prairie Turnip Slayer?

To give you a better sense of the square-state mockery afoot, check out Urban Outfitters shirt concerning Idaho. I first saw this on the torso of our former downstairs neighbor, and I didn't think it was funny then, either.

As to the shirt on the right, methinks Kansas has a little bit more than that particular model, no?

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The Lawrence Journal World is reporting that David Padgett will transfer to another school for next season.

Not sure what we'll lose on the court, besides a big-man backup to Simien, but in recruiting it hurts with NCAA regs about how many new players can be recruited into a program. KU's looking at two transfers for next season (Niang and Padgett), which will punish us in that respect.

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Continuing my infrequent series of posts on cuties in warzones, here is an excerpt from Deborah Scroggins' book Emma's War. Emma's War looks at the life of Emma McCune, a British citizen who travels to Sudan to become an aid worker and ends up marrying the commander of a faction in the Sudanese civil war.

Emma died in 1993 in a car crash in Nairobi.

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Our office's receptionist just gave me a letter informing me that a $40 parking ticket that I got is being voided. It's my first successful challenge of a parking ticket ever. I feel great!

Of course, I'm still bitter about the denial of my appeal of a $20 ticket that I received when my car was legally parked four blocks from the location cited on the ticket, but this helps salve that festering psychic wound.

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Breaking the law! Breaking the law!

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On our second night in Assisi, my sister and I had a passable prix fixe dinner before climbing up to the castle of Rocca Maggiore to take some blurry night photos of the Basilica of St. Francis.

As we were walking back down to our hotel, the Camera Martini, we passed some Americans in the street who were talking to an older Italian gentleman. It sounded like they were having some troubles, but I wasn't really paying attention since they were off to one side and up some stairs. After we had passed them, my sister turned around and asked, "Mindi?" We had run into more students from KU med, a husband and wife from Great Bend named David and Mindi.

While in Rome, David and Mindi had made reservations at a hotel but, upon arriving, found the hotel shuttered tight. What my sister and overheard was their attempts to find out whether the hotel or its restaurant were open. The place where my sister and I were staying, the Camera Martini, was run by this great older Italian couple. When we showed up with David and Mindi, the owner was happy to have the extra business.

hellx, his sister, Mindi, and David in the Camera Martini.

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From the NYT's trancript of Bush's press conference statements:

A country that hides something is a country that is afraid of getting caught.

Really? That's interesting.

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hellx contemplates mankind's all too brief time on this earth on the Palatine:

Catch, then, oh catch the transient hour;
Improve each moment as it flies!
Life ís a short summer, man a flower;
He diesóalas! how soon he dies!

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A company is claiming that its capsaicin-based nasal spray will help cure anosmia.

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Shandi Finnessey was crowned Miss USA last night. Naturally, since she's representing Missouri, she's named after a "classy" cocktail.

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My latest musical guilty pleasure is Wir Sind Helden's song "denkmal". I'm also listening to Electrelane a lot. They're no guilty pleasure. The NY Times wrote that during one of Electrelane's shows, "[t]he four musicians never acknowledged the audience and rarely acknowledged one another; they barely moved and never smiled." Naturally, I'm in love. Boing Boing introduced me to "Don't Stop Till You Get To Bollywood".

Looking for music videos online? Check out viva.tv.

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Glasses by Alain Mikli.
Jacket by Kenneth Cole.
Sweater by the Gap.
Bag by Jack Spade.
Bridge by Taddeo Gaddi.

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