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| Drink up! |
Nora and Carlos had vastly differing reactions to a souvenir, once part of a cow, brought to them by friends.
The souvenir, a 10-inch-tall flask mounted in what appears to be a cow's leg and hoof, was brought to them by friends The Spanish Inquisition! and Jebus4Me. Black, shiny and compellingly pettable, the furry memento features a polished hoof, a red leather patch with "Tequila" lettered in gold, and a cork wrapped in what might be calf or rabbit fur.
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| Three more, and you have a stampede |
"Wow," said Carlos, delighting in its furriness. "This is, without a doubt, one of the world's most amazing things." Carlos took it home on the subway, where he delighted fellow riders on the W train to Brooklyn by showing off his bit of cowishness.
Nora was less enthused. "Do not put it on the dining room table," she said.
Nora reached new levels of laziness and lassitude today, when she hired Brenda, a new domestic helper.
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| The new domestic help |
"Brenda's great," said Nora as she lazily flipped through hundreds of cable channels one sunny Saturday afternoon. "I've been so busy, I just don't know what's happened to the time. Plus, Brenda's so good."
"Yo, Brenda," she then said, shaking an empty glass at Brenda, who was on her knees cleaning the carpet.
For the princely sum of $40 a week, Nora has Brenda scooping the cat litter, answering phones, wiping dishes and clearing Nora's chicken bones off the dining room table.
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| Pampered queen Nora |
The extra help has freed Nora to pursue more worthy topics, like Internet surfing and watching "Jamie Kennedy." "Miss Nora's so busy, I'm just glad to help," Brenda said as she furiously went at Nora's clothes with a lint brush. "Nora's a big thinker. She doesn't have time for all this little stuff."
"Do you, Miss Nora?" asked Brenda. But Nora had already fallen asleep on the couch and wouldn't comment.